It’s the day after Christmas, It has been really cold out and it sometimes makes me wonder how my precious child is doing. Is he cold? Is he scared? Does he feel alone? Is he feeling pain? All those things kept running through my head and it made me sad, sad to the point where I would break down constantly and bury myself in my pity. But then I would think of him and how strong he was being and it just gave me massive strength. Louis told me he wanted to go get his babies named tattoo. This was huge to me as this was OUR son and he was now going to have him on him forever. We planned to go visit first and then go get the tattoo. But like every time Louis went this was going to be a short visit and it was. All I got out of the nurse was his gases had been acceptable through the day and they had not weaned on his vent. They were noticing a decrease in his LE BP so they were debating going up on his Dopamine again. I started getting a little concerned so I asked if they had ordered an Echo. She told me they had and that it was scheduled for later in the afternoon. I asked if they had gone back up on the PGE and she told me they were debating going up on that too and were going to wait for the Echo results. If it showed a smaller PDA then they would increase if not they wouldn’t. These setbacks bothered me a lot but I knew Mason was fighting and it wasn’t his fault he couldn’t control these things. He was doing more than he should have been and as long as he was ok I didn’t mind going backwards a few times. Today wasn’t the best day but it wasn’t the worst. It is Dec 26 and Mason survived his first Christmas
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